“Momma’s Don’t Let Your Babies Grow Up To Be Bad Cooks”

Mamas Don’t Let Your Babies – compressed

by Dee Lowe (with apologies to Willie Nelson)

Mammas don’t let your babies grow up to be bad cooks
Don’t let em eat McDonalds and Jack in the Box
Teach em to make bisquits, bagels, and lox

Mammas, don’t let your babies grow up to be bad cooks.
They’ll never stay home, fast food lanes they will roam.
With cravings for mom’s food they love.

Bad cooks ain’t easy to love and there harder to hold
And they’d rather give you a Big Mac that’s covered in mold
Pickeled pigs knuckels leave stains on your Levis
And each night begins a new day.
And if you don’t educate him, he might die young.
With clogged artieries on the way.

Mamma’s don’t let your babies grow up to be bad cooks.
Don’t let em eat McDonalds and Jack in the Box
Teach em to make bisquits, bagels and lox.

Mamma’s don’t let your babies grow up to be bad cooks.
They’ll never stay home, fast food lanes they will roam
With cravings for mom’s food they love.

(AND THE CROWD GO’S WILD)…..Thank you so much Dee!!! That was awesome! Holy cow people, can that lady sing or WHAT?!)

That song says it all moms and dads… you gotta teach your kids how to cook! One of the very best things you can teach your children (In my humble opinion) is how to cook. They’re going to need to know how to fend for themselves once they become an adult. You just can’t eat out all the time. Fast food after fast food? Coming over to YOUR house with big ol’ droopy puppy dog eyes “I’m hungry dad – will you cook me something to eat?” Oh HECK NO…

Fending for your own food in your own kitchen saves you TONS of money, and when you’re first starting out to become a productive member of society, you can use all the green backs you can get your hands on!

Bring your children into the kitchen and give them a mundane task to do. Tearing lettuce for salad, making toast, start them off easy, praise them always and make it fun for them. The quality of time you get from this is simply priceless. And they’ll WANT to learn. This is a guide of sorts on how to start your kids off. And as usual here at Rattle Them Pots And Pans, share YOUR ideas and tips

How old should they be to start? Well, they should have a pretty good grasp on the English language, (or whatever language you happen to speak – I’m assuming you speak English since you’re here!). They need to have a solid understanding of what words like, hot, sharp, stir slowly mean. The kitchen is a dangerous place, but with proper supervision you both will prosper in the mentoring process.

Ground Rules

1. You’re the Boss. “Do as I say. I will answer all your questions. If you don’t know – ASK.” Those sort of things.

2. Cleanliness. Wash you hand FIRST THING and often.

3. Safety First. When they get to the point of using a knife: Make sure what they are cutting / chopping is easy to cut and chop. Don’t start them out on carrot slicing, start them with tomato’s or bread. All the knife handling safety rules you know. Once they’ve mastered the soft stuff, move to something a little more solid and so on and so forth.

4. Clean as you go. Mess making is NOT OK. Be a tidy chef.

5. Get them their own chefs hat and apron. Customize it with their name on them. They will love it and want to help more often just for the opportunity of wearing them. Maybe even a chef’s jacket!

You can find complete instructions for making the apron & chef’s hat Patrick is wearing here:

http://www.maggiemadeit.com/sew-apron.htm

6. ALWAYS praise ALL their efforts. Even the burned stuff. “Hey, it happens to the best of us!” You learn from your mistakes.

I can think of NO BETTER PLACE to start you kid on the road to Math, than in the kitchen! Quarters, Halfs, Wholes. Quarts, Pints, Liters. Teaspoon, Tablespoon. . .

(My favorite Rule for Life: Life is a series of lessons. Until you master any given lesson, it will keep repeating. After you’ve master it, another lesson will be there to take it’s place. Until you die, the lessons never stop!)

First recipes.

Toast.

Scrambled Eggs. (Great place to experiment with seasonings)

Sandwiches. (PB&J for their first – great knife handling skills builder!)

Cookies from scratch.

Spaghetti with meat sauce.

Pan Cakes.

Mac & Cheese. (The Kraft box type)

Grilled Cheese Sandwich

My 14 year old son Harrison can cook several different complete meals. Very proficient in the kitchen. When he has visitors over and we’re getting to know them, I always ask them if they like to cook. Most of the time I get “No, my mom won’t let me.”  Then I follow up with “What’s the very best thing you mom makes?” and big smiles come to their faces. “Does your dad cook?” and “What’s your favorite thing for breakfast?” or “What’s your favorite restaurant?” And if it’s an overnighter or a weekend stay, his friends are always invited to come cook with us. Send em’ home with some skills and hopefully an interest in asking “Hey mom, can I help with dinner tonight?” their first night home. Yeah, I’m a Culinary Ambassador for the youth of this country! (Go me!)

That baby on my header design: That’s my niece Dr. Joy Conlon-Zelmonovich at 20 months old breaking bread for Thanksgiving stuffing. She’s in her 30’s now with a wonderful family of her own. A fine home chef too, thanks to her parents. (Her dad is my brother – the one with the petrified fruitcake. I just realized that fruitcake is as old as she is!!!)

And patients people, patients. Don’t get all pissed off when the spill something, or make a mess – it’s all cleanable, it’s not the end of the world, just help them clean it up and let them know it happens to the best of us.

That little Cheesy-headed-monkey-bottom-wad mixing batter up there is my niece Briana about 10 years ago. Here’s what she has to say - Those pictures of me are so ancient I can remember that day so clearly. And literally i can smell the M&M cookies. To anyone who would knock making these for being too “classic” that’s what makes it so amazing!! It is SOO much fun, and it will make the BIGGEST lasting memory for everyone involved.

Love you uncle Harry,

Cheezy Headed Monkey Bottom Wad

Love you too darlin’! Miss you bunches!

Doing Dishes SUCKS!

Yeah I Said it! It’s true. . . especially after a Thanksgiving-like feast. As kids, we use to complain to dad that we needed a dishwasher, he’d always reply with “Why would we need to get another dishwasher?! I’ve already to 6!” Great invention the Dish Washer! But still, you know as well as I do that “Doing The Dishes” is so much more than just cleaning pots, pans and the like and putting them away. It’s the whole thing: Cleaning counters, stoves*, wipe down of surfaces, sweeping up spills, the whole nine yards. Next Chef in has a nice ready to go kitchen – all clean and shiny. As much as we hate the chore, it’s a chore that needs doing plain and simple.

By no stretch of the imagination am I some sort of clean freak. (That would be one of my sisters – you know who you are) Sometimes the dishes in my kitchen sit till the next day. And yeah – I can go into a dirty kitchen and cook. Don’t like it – but I do it. Late night grilled cheese sandwich or something like that. Fry pan goes into that nights train wreck of dirty dishes, one paper plate, one butter knife, big deal. No, I’m talking about beginning the preparation of every full blown meal in a clean and sanitary kitchen. But come next nights dinner prep, the kitchen must be cleaned to begin. As much as we hate the chore, it’s a chore that needs doing plain and simple.

Once your kid is ready to prep an entire meal, let them know they’re responsible for cleaning ALL dishes, pots, pans and utensils. This makes them more aware of YOUR plight having to ask uncountable times “Just how MANY glasses do you need to use in a single day?!?!?!” Frugal  use of utensils – big on it!

Around this house are rules are as follows:

If you cook the meal, you don’t do dishes. If you cook, you MUST be tidy, cleaning up as you go.

We rotate “Doing Dishes”. Mom’s turn, dad’s turn, son’s turn. And if for whatever reason, you get stuck with cooking and your dishwasher is unavailable: Suck it up and don’t be a Slacker Cry Baby. Write it down and so & so ‘owe’s ‘ me. (writing it down is the only way to go. Having witness’s doesn’t work) And it’s a chore that is an awesome piece of betting power, better than money! “Cowboys vs. Cardinals today dad. Who you taking?”

“Cardinals of course!”

“How much?”

“Dishes for a week? – “You’re ON!”

Before your kids are old enough to figure out you’re lying to them; tell them the dishwasher is broken and ALL the dishes need to be washed BY HAND!” – - – ‘aaaaaah, the horror!’ Good, hands on sanitation class! Hot soapy water, scrubbing, rinsing in cold water vs. hot water, good stuff they need to learn.

As much as we hate the chore, it’s a chore that needs doing plain and simple.

Snickerdoodles

by Joe Conlon

Harriet Dower Conlon, Peggy Dower McNeley, and “Betty Crocker”. . .

This is the first thing I remember “helping with” in the kitchen. Both my mom and my Aunt Peggy made these cookies and we loved them. My first“job” was to roll the dough into little balls and then roll them in the cinnamon. I could make them myself by age 7. I remember being amazed at how the little balls of dough would flatten out in the oven and they’d get this crinkly surface. It seemed like magic to me. “Snickerdoodles” – I loved saying the word. Fun to say – fun to smell – fun to eat warm from the oven with a cold glass of milk. Baking these fill the kitchen with the most wonderful aroma imaginable. I can’t make these cookies without that aroma bringing back my childhood memories. We made them when my kids Joy and Jason were little too. It’s a great recipe to start teaching kids to cook. The recipe came from my mom’s very old (1950’s era) Betty Crocker loose leaf cookbook. It’s the exact recipe we used. I remember mom used to get a chapter of that book each month in the mail – kind of like book of the month club and the whole family would get excited and we’d watch her put the chapter in the binder and we’d look at the pictures and know she’d be trying new recipes on us. I also remember wondering why they just didn’t send the whole book at once. We kids didn’t like just getting “The Side dishes” or “Beverages” chapter – we wanted the good stuff – like these “Cookies”. This last summer I had a houseful of great nieces and nephews for about a week. I put them all to work in the kitchen and we made pizzas, snickerdoodles, and chocolate chip cookies. Even the littlest had their “jobs”. I told them the story above that goes with the cookies. Man! Did the house smell great that day, and a new generation now connects with their heritage.

Joe 12/7/2009

Mix together thoroughly …

1 cup soft shortening (Crisco)

1 ½ cups sugar

2 eggs

Sift together and stir in …

2 3/4 cups sifted GOLD MEDAL Flour

2 tsp. Cream of tartar

1 tsp. Baking soda

1/2 tsp. Salt

Chill dough. Roll into balls the size of small walnuts. Roll in mixture of 2 tbsp. Sugar and 2 tsp. Cinnamon. Place about 2″ apart on ungreased baking sheet. Bake until lightly browned … but still soft. (These cookies puff up at first … then flatten out with crinkled tops.)

Temperature: 400 (mod. Hot oven).

Time: Bake 8 to 10 minutes

Amount: About 5 doz. 2″ cookies.

Raggey Ann Salad

by WarsawNan

If you’ve got kids that are picky eaters, they’re more likely to eat if you let them fix their own meal. When my daughters were pre-schoolers, I began their culinary education with this simple, fun and healthy lunch plate, and they LOVED it.

RAGGEDY ANN SALAD

1 canned peach OR pear half (for the body)

1 piece curly lettuce (for her skirt)

1/2 hard-boiled egg, cut length-wise (for her head)

1 slice of American cheese, cut into thin strips (for her hair)

4 small celery ribs (legs and arms)

1 black olive, or marachino cherry, cut in half (for the shoes)

1 golden raisin (for her nose)

3 dark raisins (eyes and buttons)

1 marachino cherry (her mouth)

Small dab of mayo (for “glue”)

Place the drained peach or pear half cut-side down in the center of a dinner plate. With a paper towel, pat the top of the fruit dry. Tuck the lettuce leaf under the bottom edge of the fruit for her skirt. Slide 2 celery ribs under the lettuce for the legs, and put the “shoes” in place. Place the other 2 celery ribs on each side of the fruit/body for her arms.

Place the egg half at the top of the fruit for her head. Arrange the sliced cheese around the head for her hair.

You’ll be attaching the buttons (on the body) and the face features using a tiny dab of mayo to hold them in place. With a paper towel, dry the cherry so that cherry juice doesn’t run on the egg; then slice the cherry so you have a “smile” shape. Cut small pieces from one dark raisin for the eyes, so they’re smaller than the whole raisin used for the nose.

Pepperoni Pizza Cheese Spread

by WarsawNan

Invented a new cheese spread today, and Chelsea & Kaysea just finished testing it and gave it a thumbs up. Pepperoni Pizza Cheese Spread. It’s easy enough for kids to make. Figured it would be great to keep in the fridge for a quick after-school snack, or a “pizza” when you don’t have any real pizza.

It’s good cold on crackers, but for the girls’ taste test I toasted some English muffins, spread it on top, then broiled it for a little less than 2 minutes. They really liked it, but Chelsea suggested next time I spread a thinner layer because it was TOO cheesy. (“too cheesy” – no such thing! That’s like saying “too garlicy”) I agreed with her critique.

(The reason it looks like it’s a cheddar cheese base is just because there’s tomato paste in it. It’s mozerella cheese.)

16 oz. shredded mozzarella cheese

8 oz. sliced pepperoni (I noticed whole slices of pepperoni in your photo… Wouldn’t dicing them up be better for a more even distribution? I do that when I make pizza at home. It spreads out the Pepperoni more evenly so you get some in every bite and you don’t yank off all the cheese that’s attached to the single piece of pepperoni)

4.5 oz. can chopped green chiles

3 T. tomato paste

1 T. extra virgin olive oil

1/4 c. sour cream

1 tsp. garlic powder

3 tsp. oregano

1/2 tsp. cayenne pepper

Directions

Place half of the pepperoni in food processor (with chopping blade) along with remaining ingredients and process until smooth.

Using a rubber spatula, transfer cheese spread into a mixing bowl.

Cut remaining 4 oz. of sliced pepperoni into quarters. Fold into cheese spread.

Enjoy!!!

P.S. I made this specifically for my grandkids, who don’t like “yucky stuff” like mushrooms, black olives and onions. If I was making it for myself, I’d add the “yucky stuff”.

Maybe the PERFECT cooking class for your kid.

Homemade Mashed Potato’s - Think about it: Ya gotta peel em’, knife or peeler skills. Ya gotta rinse em off real good, sanitation and colander skills. Boil em’, pan size selection, water transfer skills, applying heat, safety tips for that ‘back to the colander’ step. Dicing and mashing and how much butter. Buttermilk vs. Whole milk, salt, pepper . . . . touch of garlic? Maybe a bit of cheese? Hey, how bout’ lots of cheese and brown them all nice and crusting in the oven?!

Mashed Potato’s. A license to get creative in the kitchen. Make sure you teach your kids how to make em’.

(Dashney Hook shown here at her work station, putting the finishing touches on her perfect homemade mashed potato’s.)

Your Comments:

WarsawNan says - Dash is 5 years old and LOVES to help in the kitchen. The most important things I teach her with every cooking session are safety and cleanliness. We always start by scrubbing our hands. And rather than having her stand on the step-stool so she could reach the counter height to mash the potatoes, I brought the pan of potatoes down to her height for safety sake.

Another important lesson she was learning here was that a good cook ALWAYS tastes as they cook in order to get the seasoning just right. After this initial tasting, Dash decided to add more salt, pepper, butter and sour cream to her mashed potatoes. They were really delicious, and she was SO proud when she served them to the family!

Marty C. – I like to either make a fresh batch or it’s a great way to get rid of left over mashed potato’s. Heat them up in the microwave, line a soup size bowl with the mashed potato’s about an inch thick. You’ve already warm up and ready to be served a can of soup or stew – any kind. (Thick stew’s are my favorite for this) Pour the soup into your bowl of mashed potato’s. It’s GOOD!

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